I am just so sad. I just want to sit and cry forever. I miss him so much. I didn’t talk to him today and I know that’s what I wanted but I keep thinking about him all the time. Wondering about where he is and what he’s doing. I know that I really don’t want to know but why won’t my mind and heart stop? I feel like I will never be happy again. I feel like I will never find love again. Why? What did I do to deserve this crap? I always did my best by him, so why did he just drop me like yesterday’s garbage? I don’t understand. Why did this have to happen to me? It just hurts so much. Will I ever be happy again? Does this ever get any better? I just feel like it never will.
Getting over someone can sometimes appear to be impossible. It feels really bad when you fall in love with someone you can’t have. It feels even worse when you are sure that this relationship can never work out. I think that this is the worst thing that could ever happen to someone. I believe that to forget someone is one of the hardest assignments given in life, especially if you had this gut feeling that he/she is the ONE. Therefore all of these thoughts crossing my mind drove me deeply into the psychology of what is called falling wrongly into love.
Getting over someone you love will be a matter of weeks if not days.
If you think that pain is an essential part of love, if you think that lovers should suffer then stop reading. However, if you believe that exaggerated attachment is something that hinders you from living a happy life and if you believe that this pain is unnecessary then keep reading. Breakups won’t hurt like they used to, you wont label anybody as the one from now on and recovery is going to take place much faster.
How to get over someone you love
Since I am not a magician, I can’t say that a simple writing will do the job, and this pain won’t disappear in a blink of an eye, but remember, reading this will make you feel as you are a step closer to get rid of this pain that unfortunately could last for years.
Figuring out how to get over someone you love can be one of the most difficult things that any of us will ever have to do. The pain of loss can be very intense and finding the answers can be like looking for a needle in a haystack. You need to know that it will take a lot of time and some days will be harder than others. If you have been with someone for a long period of time, their absence can make you feel like a part of you is missing, like you just had your heart ripped right out of your chest. But once you discover how to get over someone you love, the pain in your heart will lessen and you sill start feeling more like your old self again.
Sometimes I wish I could just smack the idiot that came up with the phrase “Time heals all wounds“. Actually, the person that said that, is right. You may not want to hear this but, time is the exact remedy needed for this wound. That being said, it does not mean that you have to like it. I know that I never did. There are ways for you to take an active approach in helping time heal you a little faster though.
Start by ditching the photos. You do not need the constant visual reminder of happy times spent with that person drawing your attention at every turn. Throw away or put in storage any of their belongings that they have left behind. You may also want to consider trying to stay away from some of the places that the two of you used to hang out at. You will never find out how to get over someone you love if you are constantly running into them.
Don’t be afraid to use your friends as a sounding board. In most cases they have been through a painful break up too. Spend as much time with them as you can. When you are having a good time with friends, your mind will be occupied and you will not be thinking about that person so much. Just because you are trying to figure out how to get over someone you love does not mean that you should stop living your life. I know that this can be a very trying time in your life. Losing someone you love is never easy. But there is one thing that you may not have considered. Is it really and truly over between you and your loving person? If you really do love them it may be possible for you to get your loving person back. You can lose the love of your life due to both of :being foolish, stubborn, and too proud to admit that you are really in love and needed . Of course, you are the only one that can decide if the love you have is worth saving. If there is even a possibility that you can save your relationship, you really need to give it a try.
A Painful Process
To get over someone you love you have to realize that there are no easy answers. No matter how ready you think you are, the fact that you are asking yourself how to get over someone you love, means that it is going to be a painful process. It can be a slow process You might think you are over someone and a year later being reminded of that person and feel sad again. That does not mean that you’re not overcome the loving person.
If you are emotionally invested in a supposed relationship and it ends, it could make you feel sad for years. Maybe even for the rest of your life. But that does not mean the sadness has to make you feel depressed. You can get over your loss and still know that it made you sad. It’s the period of time soon after the loss that will be the hardest to get passed. This is the period where you ask yourself how to get over someone you love and she does not love you back.
Removing Reminders
If the break up is a fresh one usually the only way to get over the pain is to face it straight out and let time pass. It is going to hurt, no matter what you do. But there are some things you can do to lessen the pain. Start with removing noticeable visual reminders of the person if possible. Pictures of them can be put away for now. Gifts they gave you can also be put away for now. Avoiding the places you used to go together is a good idea as well. This tip can be found in lists everywhere on how to get over a lost love so it is at least a popular idea that is worth trying.
Living Life after the Breakup
If you are having difficulty living your life after the breakup, it might be a good idea to seek counseling. Simply let the counselor know that you just went through a break up and ask the counselor how to get over someone you love. They can offer you better advice than a generic list about how to get over someone you love. They can also offer better advice than family and friends.
Friends and Family
Your friends and family may feel they know your situation too well. Some of them may even have motives to help you get over the person who does not love you back. They might have not liked the person so they want you to get over them quickly and move on to someone else. With a counselor you can privately tell them things you would not want your friends and family to know.
If you seek out counseling you should continue to see them for as long as you need to. If the counselor feels like you are dwelling on the breakup longer than you need to, they will let you know.
Advices
- I am going through this right now. For those of you whose situation is similar, this is what I suggest: Deal with reality. Stop hoping, dreaming, etc. Pray and tell God that you forgive them for not being able to love you. Ask God to take this from you – and He will. Then continue to deal with reality. Don’t tell yourself, maybe someday… they’ll change… True love accepts the person for who they are, even when they are evil and they don’t love you. It means accepting reality. When you love and accept reality at the same time, you are forced to move on. When you deal with reality and move on without love, you take bitterness with you. When you love without dealing with reality, you hurt yourself. Love the other person, Accept the reality and pray to God for the wisdom and strength you’ll need to do that continuously until it ceases to become a problem.
- Try not to be in contact because its almost like an addiction. You think that one little text will do no harm but the pain when he doesn’t reply will just make things worse.
- Time…. Letting yourself grieve and actually being ok with that. Not forcing yourself to get over someone. Allow yourself to feel the hurt, cry, write about it, listen to sad songs. Soon you will feel so tired from hurting all of the time. You will be ready to move forward. Doing this without contact of the person you love is best. Anyone that will still see you, sleep with you, and spend time with you, knowing they don’t love you, and knowing how you feel, is selfish. Everyone deserves more than that. You can’t force love out of your heart so don’t try, that just hurts worse and you end up lying to yourself. You are human for loving, but you have to love yourself more. I do agree with comments on staying busy, friends and family also help. Casual dating can backfire however, because if the dates don’t go well, it will just make you miss the person you love even more. Pray, and remember the good times but learn from the bad. Don’t you want, one day, to be truly happy? Life is to short to give up the chance of true love for yourself. Go out into the world and continue to be the wonderful person that you are. Someone will see this, and love you just as much as you are capable of loving.
- maybe you should really think, are they the one for me? And do i really love them?
- You have no choice but to get over this person… let them go and move on.
You never stop loving someone; you just learn to live without them.
Free your mind from worries. Live simple. Give more. Expect less.
You have to know that there is now another step to walk in your life..
there will be always happiness and love, hope you’ll find it
i wish you all the best.. just keep smiling : )
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I'm speechless; but I know my heart and I know no matter what, the love will always be there. Will it fade? Who knows, right now… I have no clue. Its like a path where you can only see what is right in front of you. You are walking in a fog and as you walk, slowly, you hope the fog will clear and the sky will shine again. So your head is hung low to see the small steps you are taking. Until the fog lifts, you are unable to see what or who is around you. Just waiting for that fog to clear.
it hurts a lot to know that someone who we really love is actually not for us.. ;-( but life has to move on..
The time is near. So much sadness has been endured in this world. the Lord is on His way, in whatever form he wishes to come in. we live in the end of times, it’s all so close.
not all may find their love. but love has found us all.
God Bless,
-lost soul
Just broke up with my girl friend. I valued her more than my life. willing to do anything for her but she just left me for another guy who doesn't even truly care about her. she is admiring him a lot and stopped all the interactions with me. I just wanted to stop her making the bad decision. she is not willing to listen to me at all. she just played me. She did not love me at all. but i loved her so much. i dreamed a life her. she is gone. not even responding to my text messages. but i am not mad or disappointed or angry at her. i love her still and will love forever. i tried my best to save our relationship. i even begged her. i am not ashamed to as she is so important to me than anything else in this world. don't know whether i will be in any relationship here after. will have to wait and see what time has in store for me.
I've been through this once.. i know its hard, but at one point you will realize that you are wasting your time thinking about her, while she doesn't even think about you,
you will be Ok, its a matter of time
yeah. i agree. thanks for your kind words.
you are not alone. does time heal? I don’t know. but it numbs, that I am sure of. Your situation reminds me of my own. You have a good heart. Be strong. I won’t lie to you and say someone new will brighten your life. Though, sad as it may be, hope is all we have. Hope and Time, we all have plenty of.
You find your true self in your darkest hours.
God Bless.
-lost soul
Awee; That’s soo sweet.! I hope things will get better! Yess, I don’t kno you , but the same thing happend to me with my boyfriendd.! I wish the best for you guyss,if you ever need anything,just text mee..!
—Beccaa,(:
You’ll be finee.!
I spent 2 years with someone and he moved away for a job. He works 12 hr days and though we text several times a day I dont know when we will have time to see each other. He is just starting his career and I am already established. We have an age difference. He says he loves me every day but I miss him so much. I dont want to go on for years like this to have him realize that we are now living 2 different worlds.
regardless of the hardships u may face, if your love for him and his love for you are strong than in the end you will have a great life full of love with each other, and the hard times only help to build that bond up. you should never give up on your heart's desires.
i have a similar problem. i love someone so much i think about them all day everyday. even my dreams are about them. i know they love me too. we have known each other for a long time and talk about everything. and we want to get married, but we live on different sides of the world. even though we can take steps to make things happen, they can't… they are locked by traditions… but is that really right? should someone else really be able to tell us how to live our lives or who to love? in the end we are the ones that have to live with the choices not anyone else, so why should what they say really matter?
i have loved my boyfriend ever since i can remember,we have been through a lot together,i gave him my heart as he did with his,through out my past relationships i have never fully given myself to any guy,just like any couple we had our plans of getting married but i guess life had to be life and show us that we not as invisible as we thought,at this point i dont think i'll ever love any1 else the way i loved him,knowing i'll never get to touch him,hear his laughter or even see him it still sends tears down my face,i think i wud rather have lost him 2 sum1 else rather than to death…
I'm so sorry missary :-(
hope you will find some1 who will bring happiness to your life again
its really hard to love the wrong person…
I have a problem too. we had a kid together. then she decided to leave me for some guy over twice her age that she met online that lives on the other side of the planet. Its crazy because I am pretty sure i love her but the more i think about it the less sure i am of that fact. I dunno its pretty insane how things are. We live together for the sake of the kid and she says she wants me back but i know that she doesnt really feel that way…I just dont know what is right because losing her means the possibility of losing my son.
I'd stick for my son
if she left you for another guy then there is your answer she doesn’t love you. You should move on and find your true love. I know it’s a hard think to do ,but trust me it will all be worth it, God will help you find someone that loves you just as much as you do and you can still be a good father to your son and still love him just don’t be miserable and don’t let her control you.My advice that i want to give you pray about it and God will help. You seem like a good person hang in there and it will all work itself out.
God Bless
I never wouldve thought that this much pain could occur in my life. I didnt expect for this to even happen, I cant stop thinking aboout him. Why should we be able to fall in love with someone that we know wont love us back under any cercumstances? Why must we be able to go through the pain we go through just to have the result of: we can NEVER be together? Why can we be able to experience this?!?!?! I used to ask myself what i did to deserve this? Why should I be the one to fall in love with someone I cant be with, when other ppl are happily in love with someone who they can be with? How did I know I was in love with him? When i realised that i was constatly thinking of him, when I wasnt meaning to think at all he was still there in my brain. I would give my life for him, and what am I to him? A best friend,,.
im searching for the answers 2 …
It is so hard to come to the realization that your love for someone will not be reciprocated. I fell in love with a straight guy 20 years younger than me, I am gay. We have strong feelings for each other and really get along so well, he just can't come out and likes girls too, if only I were a girl, we have great sex and nice times together, we enjoy our company and have known each other for 6 years off and on, getting together regularly, I just love him, but he cannot come out fully nor accept us as a true couple, I need to end this as it is just too hard for me to live this way, I want more, I want it all, I want it openly , all day 24 hours, a life together, he cannot commit this way, it is not easy, but since I love him, I need to let him go and hope he finds what he is looking for, I need to face reality, I need to be happy complete, I need to realize as he is now, we cannot be together the way I want to. Don't ever fall in love with a bi guy who cannot give his whole heart to me a gay person, it is so hard, so painful, I love him so, but need to move on. I will do my best, it is not going to be easy, thanks for your website.
help. i love him, i want him back, he’s seems completely not interested he still hasn’t spoke to me since he finished me, but he keeps staring at me, he wont be around me he makes it awkward if he has to stand near me. i hate it. i love him so much i just don’t know what to do
love hurts
You know? Is really sad that when a woman goes out with a man younger than her is sick, however, you see man dating and getting married with woman that could be their dad and that is ok.
So why for the woman is sick and for the man is cool?
age doesn’t matter
I fell in a love with him ever since we dated and I never knew what love was until I met him. I love everything about him and just the way he is. We had a great time together and we didn’t break up because we weren’t compatible, but I found out that I’m actually and probably not the person he loved the most. He made me so confused and doubtful about the way he felt for me and I was so hurt, so I called it off. It’s been about 4 and 1/2 months and I still feel so hurt. I have never cried for anyone. Never. I have never opened up myself to someone else. And he turned out to be the person that really broke me from the inside. I thought that there was something really special between us that I can’t explain, but now I have just become skeptical. He made me the happiest person and now also the saddest person. I agree with what is said here about how you have a sense of loss and like a limb has been ripped off from me, I still have this sensation that my limb is attached (Phantom Limb).
I am trying so hard to move on with love and forgiveness because I actually believe that love can be kind and patient (like everyone describes) and I am trying so hard to not become bitter.
But somehow I can’t stop this anger inside of me, this jealousy and this frustration inside.
I still love him and I think I will always have a soft spot for him, but right now, I feel like I am not nobody. I have lost my self-confidence and myself. I carry on working and I carry on my day to day activities with a smile, but at the end of day when I’m alone, I just want to cry and I feel so upset.
I am so tired of putting up a face to try to seem okay when I’m not.
He suggested that we should be friends and that it would be great between us, but somehow I don’t find that to be possible right now.
My mind is telling me to not force myself to be okay, but to live with acceptance of the existence of my pain, but before I can be his friend, I should be my own friend first.
I am trying to see everything in a better light and when I am about to lie on pillow at night, I believe that there is someone out there who lying on their pillow and will love me truly and where I will also love him with all I have.
I have so many days where I miss my ex so much, where I am so tempted to call him to hear his voice and to know how he is doing. Yet, I feel so vulnerable at that point to talk to him because it seems like I am in this pain all by myself…
I pray that God will be with me all the way and make me stronger from the inside.
I hope that God will look after me and allow me to succeed in all my endeavours and fulfil my personal goals when I seem to be lost right now.
I love you. I always have and always will.
I care about you more than you will ever know.
I love you more than you will ever know and more than I will ever show.
I hope that you have a happy life and I hope that you will also wish me the best.
I haven’t forgiven you fully, but I am trying.
I haven’t fully accept that we can no longer be together because I am still hoping deep down inside.
I haven’t let this burning jealousy of you and her go because I gave and poured my whole heart to you
I haven’t been able to fully be your friend because I am still hurting inside
Most of all, I haven’t forgiven myself yet because I know that I haven’t been treating myself well.
Dear Me,
I’m sorry that I haven’t loved you enough.
I will learn to try to love you more each day instead
With God by our side, I know that one day we can make it together
Keep on having faith and don’t fail me now.
Because we both need each other.
I’m speechless :/
but i hope that you will see a better days and i hope that you will meet the person that will love you enough to make you forget about your ex
Eish! I have been caught up over some one for over three yrs now i still love him so much ive tried every thing listed above but nothing has work i well admit at first i did not deal with thing and kept seing him, texted, called the works until i realised that it wasnt working so i kept my distance i totally avoided him to be exact for a whole year thing got better i felt better and now we recently started contacting each other again and its made me realise that i still love him i feel like im back to spuare one HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sobing strong
He is the best companion ever, soft and simple, wants the company but was never fully committed to the relationship. i am in love and thought, this was all i could ever want, suddenly i discovered that he hadn’t lived past his ex, he still loved her and said it was a huge mistake not marrying her. This made me lose confidence in myself, i felt i could never make him happy, and that i was no good. yet i loved him. the gap between us grew wider, and he said he lost his peace with me, and i became devastated, his peace was yet to come as i always followed up just to preserve the love we had, although he said in his texts that he loved me, i found it difficult to believe, talking with him became so difficult, i was suffocating and felt frustrated, i tried to have us talk about everything, but he said i was being impatient. his silence made me worry the more. the truth that broke the ice was that i had health history that he couldn’t deal with. i was forced to come to terms with the fact that it was over, he said we could still move on but my self worth had come to a zero point, thanks to my love and before i knew it, it was already over. i feel hurt because i put off the relationship, i feel hurt because he couldn’t find a day to discuss his fears with me till it tore us apart. i feel hurt because i had the hope of building a future with him. i still love him, and wont stop. but i have to move on, with the fact that he deserved whats best for him. i have moved on, but sometimes i cant help but pour out my feelings.
Reading this tonight breaks heart because I have lost someone that I love more than anyone in this world, other than my children. He says he loves me and we were meant to meet, and even though we are going through hell right now, he thinks in the end it will be something beautiful. Our problem is not “us” keeping us apart… it’s his ex wife. She has moved on and remarried, but still controls him and abuses him after 13 years of being together. He can’t see past her abuse and empty threats about their kids, as I feel he has battered men’s syndrome. He believes everything she tells him… from he’s a horrible father, everything is fault, she yells and berates him on a daily basis, along with she says I’m taking him away from his children (which I’m not), he is a deadbeat, and the list goes on and on. I have never met someone in my entire life like her. I’m 39 and have been in several failed relationships, and I met him and started falling in love with him the day we met, and he says the same. He feels torn in between his kids and me, and his ex is making his kids hate me. He is so weak in his thinking, that she gets into his head and doesn’t want to lose his children, even though they have court papers with set visitation. I have talked to him for hours on end and have tried to help him through this and see the light and I’m here to support, and what do I get today when I need to talk about what is going ?? “I can’t do this today.” he says to me. He says he loves me and wants me so bad, but he needs to get things settled with his divorce papers, etc., and he understands why I feel the way I do. I am getting nothing but mixed messages all the time anymore. It’s affecting me on every level… I can’t eat, work, or be the mother I need to be to my own children, because I’m so depressed. I’m so distraught over everything, I have been throwing up. I don’t know if I should stick by his side or walk away, and the thought of walking away is devastating to me. He says I’m wonderful and he has never felt this way. I don’t know what to do.
I stumbled upon this page by accident but I can relate to it though…In 2006 I met someone and I fell so hard for him like never before. It was love at first sight and I was madly in love with him and I ended up giving up my job, selling my house and relocating from one end of the country to the other to be with him in 2008. I would have done anything for him because I loved him so much.
I didn’t realise though that he’d been seeing someone else and only 3 months after I had relocated to be with him he ended up moving in with her and her 3 children from a previous relationship and I hadn’t done anything wrong to deserve that.
I was absolutely devastated at the time. I cried for weeks on end, couldn’t eat, couldn’t sleep, started having anxiety attacks which I’d never experienced before…It seemed my whole world fell apart and there was nothing I could do…but I somehow managed to convince myself that he and I were definitely ment to be together and I was certain he’d come back.
I wasn’t short of male attention, I was 31 years old, tall, slim and attractive. I felt guilty when I got involved with someone else the following year because I was still certain that he would come back someday and when that relationship ended he contacted me via msn webcam!
He apologised for hurting me, wanted to know where I was, what I was doing and if I would meet him…The feelings that I had for him hadn’t gone and I don’t think his had either…2 faces, both smiling and tears running down our cheeks. We arranged to meet but the day before our planned meeting in 2009, he had an accident at work and broke his leg. I was gutted.
We remained in contact via webcam for weeks and then one day he blocked me and I never heard from until my birthday that year. He said he was sorry and that he’d missed me and wanted to see me but I later found out that he was still living with her and her children and that they were expecting their first baby. I don’t know why he kept doing this…it was as though he didn’t want me but he didn’t want anyone else to have me either. He even sent me photos of his daughter when she was born in August 2010.
Any relationships I had were short term ones. He was still contacting me up until a few months ago telling me that he’d made a huge mistake and I was the right woman for him but we met at the wrong time in his life and that their relationship wasn’t working out but he said he couldn’t leave his daughter although I never asked him too. He wanted to see me and have sex with me.
I booked a hotel and told him the room number and boarded the train only to be contacted by him and told he couldn’t make it because he was ill but that he would try to get away to spend time with me which he never did during my time there so I ended up returning home.
In the meantime I had problems of my own…I was 34 years old and diagnosed with Premature Ovarian Failure. I was alone and needed to find a sperm donor asap.
I guess it was no surprise with the amount of stress my body had been put under over the past 5 years because of him and what I allowed him to put me through as well as being raped by another ex.
I knew I couldn’t put my life on hold any longer,…it was now or never and I’d always dreamed of being a mother so I threw caution to the wind and decided to start searching for a donor. I got a lot of replies but I only met with one.
We met up for a coffee and a chat in June 2011 and there was something about him that I was attracted to. I couldn’t stop smiling and for the first time in a long time I actually felt happy and safe in the company of a man.
I originally wanted to try via artificial insemination but the day before the planned meeting I changed my mind and opted for natural insemination. He was lovely, kind, caring, supportive and funny too!
I didn’t know what to expect but he was very loving and gentle towards me, he made me laugh and smile a lot but all I spoke of was my ex and I did the same again the following month until I realised that I actually liked my donor more than I did my ex but I guess over the years I had somehow managed to convince myself that I would only have a future with my ex and nobody else.
I could have kicked myself when I realised what I had done!
I had put my life on hold from 20th June 2008 because that was the last time I saw him in person and I had been unsubconsciously driving nice guys away!
At least I have realised this now and been able to rectify things.
The funny thing is when I decided that was it and I’d had enough; I didn’t even get upset.
I am no longer in contact with my ex and I never wish contact with him again.
The moral of my story is…THE ONLY THING THAT COMES TO THOSE WHO WAIT IS OLD AGE! Please don’t make someone a priority if they won’t make you theirs.
Don’t love someone who doesn’t/can’t/won’t love you back…the world is a big place and there is someone out there for everyone so don’t waste your tears on someone because life is ment to be enjoyed.
I’m much happier now and although we’re not pregnant yet, I’m happy being in love with someone who makes me smile all the time and he tells me it’s mutual.
Love and Blessings
xxxxx
that’s my point, find some1 that will love u back although it seems hard to give up the 1 u luv, but again as u said life is meant to be enjoyed
and I’m glad ur happy now :)
Exactly. If you love someone that will not love you back,it is a waste of time and you’re the one who ended up hurt . :D
I have a serious crush on one of my friends. we are almost close and we like each other,but there have never been a bright sign of his love for me, and i know that because of certain issues and differences we have, nothing can happen between us.the worst part is that, I cant stop seeing him because we are both in a group of close friends and hanging out like once a week at least, so giving up seeing him, means giving up every body, and it is impossible.Although it hurts a lot, I know that I just have to get over him,or suffer for the rest of my life.but he is just perfect.he is handsome, smart,kind,caring, he is a doctor, he has a really good and rich family,there is no bad point about him,how can I a handle this?:((
u know saba there is a quote saying
“Looking back, I have this to regret, that too often when I loved, I did not say so.”
“love that is given, can never be taken back. be careful where you place your heart, for it is our heart that leads into our soul.”
- lost soul
Hey. I don’t know youu? Buttttt, I’m Becca, (: Are you okaa?
not really. thank you for asking :)
I’m Peter. Pleasure to meet you.
ignore the creepy smiley. lol.
-lost soul
Oh my,that is a very big burden that you have done to forget about someone that you really love. I’m also facing the same problem and i don’t know how to solve it but after reading your post ,it helps me to solve it a little . “It’s hard to give away your love,but if you wait,the right one will come to you instead”
~Cat :3
im glad my post has helped some1 : )
Yeah ! that’s great :)) Btw now,are you still thinking about it ?
never:P
congrats man. i tip my hat to you.
thank you :), and evey1 else should do that.. live your life happy!!! nothing worth to grieve or to be sad <3..
Hahahahah! Good for you :))
i love him so much,i keep on telling myself that he wil come around nd realize dt i trully luve him,but hes running as far as he can everyday,he once made me happy i be myslf wen am wit him bt none of dis makes him aware dt am mad bou him.
you have to make a choice. many of us do. is it the right choice? that’s something we’ll struggle to find out.
-lost soul
am dying insyd
love yourself utmost ,then u wont have any pain anyday
love yourself utmost ,then u wont have any pain anyday
Hey guys, need some advice. I have a friend, we know each other pretty well (about 3 years). I always liked her, but just like a sister to me. Well she was in a relationship since we first met, so maybe thats why, im not sure. Anyway, we spent a lot of time together and i guess it started to be awkward, we were together more often than she was with her boyfriend. But nothing ever happened between us. So not long ago, she hooked me up with her sister, we were dating and all of us could hang out, nothing was suspicious until i realized that im dating her sister just to be with her. Then i broke up with that sister, but we stayed good friends… But now, i feel like we’re getting closer than ever before, we even kissed (half drunk). Im just not sure, if its just me, or she has same or similar feelings for me as i have for her. And i dont want to mess up her relation… It just feels like i can never be with her, even thats the only thing i want, and its so hard to be around her and feel this. I never told her and i guess i never will. Should i leave it, stop meeting her for some time and get over it? I fear it will be back when i see her again. What would you do?
I’m sure you’ve resolved your issue by now…but just in case there is time. I would suggest not to go for it. I had a wonderful friend and since he confessed to me that he loved me, the relationship has changed. he’s hot and cold with his emotions and we don’t communicate like we used to. This is just my experience and maybe it would work out but I think if you really value your friendship, you may want to hold off. I miss our calls to each other in the mornings to work or after work…talking about each other’s day. i miss the simple things and now i feel like i lost a best friend. i’m not sure exactly why or how it changed. i don’t want to be the clingy or demanding type so i haven’t asked him. maybe one day i will. sometimes he reaches out and is so kind but then he doesn’t contact me for weeks. anyways, good luck with whatever decision you make.
Thanks :) yeah I didn’t go for it, it was hard to convince myself but I think I’m over it. What helped me was, when I tried to be more open with her, she didn’t “came along” Suddenly it was like a slap – you are just a friend, one amongst many. She doesn’t really care about me, or thats what i convinced myself to believe – but i feel better now, and don’t have to care about it anymore. Thank you again for your comment. Good luck with everything and take care!
the thing that hurt me a lot is she hate me a lot for no reason!!!! and she ‘s saying bad things about me in front of people. Plus, I see her a lot around at university . Always, when I want forget her, I find her in front of me and she even stare at me to say that she hate me. I really want to stop seeing her to forget her. The way she always look at me is killing me. always when I see her, my heart beats get so fast and I feel I can not even breath or talk, so I can not even talk to her, so ignore her always.
That’s killing me for many years .
I wish if there was a magician who can make me forget her . then I will pay that magician all my money, any advice????
I’m a girl, so I can’t exactly give you a boys advice but I say that you just speak to her, try to reason with her about how she feels, I know you are trying to forget her but if you speak to her and try to ease the hate that she has then you can just be friends and she will leave you alone and you can Just go on as normal without worrying about bumping into her and he giving you evil looks. I wish you good luck Xxx
I know it may sound stupid and totally silly but I am seriously in love with a man called Professor Brian Cox who is a physicist in London. He has done lots of books, Tv shows and he is so dreamy, his voice is soft like an angels voice, his face is beautiful, his eyes shine and he is more than just my type, we both adore astronomy, we both love physics and he is so special to me. He has taught me so much and he has inspired me, then a dead end appeares. We don’t know each other, he is married, he has to kids and I am only 14 years old. You may think I am being hormonal but I am not, my heart tells me he is the one and when I found out he was married, I started shaking and feeling sick. Help me, I need advise on how to get over it! He isn’t the one!!???
Professor Brian Cox Was my teacher at Manchester university, he taught me so much about particles but I wouldn’t say he was an angel, he was quite a normal teacher.
But keep strong, you will find a smart, loving, kind and angelic person one day! Xx
It may sound strange to you but I was actually in a relationship with Professor Brian Cox when I met him at the University of Manchester. I feel so sorry for you, i stumbled across this page after I fell in love with Sean Kingston but knew I couldnt have him. I have to tell you that every rose has it’s thorn, Brian isn’t all sweet and intelligent he has problems with being strong, he is weak. Sorry but you will find someone good!
I am in love with an astronomer called Jim and he is so sweet, kind, caring and he is always giggly and likes to laugh, he is totally my type it I heard that he is getting married to a woman that used to work at my school. We have had so much fun together and we even went out with eac other once but he is moving to Kansas in Texas to do storm chasing with his wife! Please help what can I do, he is totally the one for me and I remember when he used to take me out under the stars and teach me about the universe an then we’d kiss.
I am in love.The problem is I can’t have him.He is my best friends boyfriend.I know that she doesn’t love him but still I could NEVER betray her like that.When I was new in school she was the first friend I had.When I was uncool and lonely she was the coolest kid in school,but she still became my friend.She didn’t care what it did to her reputation.She still was there for me through thick and thin.Hell and high waters.But seeing him with another girl hurts.
Hi Anon! I’m in a kind of a same situation here. She is my best friend, the only true friend I have now – so of course I felt for her, and same as you, I can’t have her. Problem is that I think she feels the same about me, but she is in relationship and it would mess things up with her family and so … So i did the only thing I could. The only honorable thing. I stopped seeing her, it was hard, hell, it still is hard, but it gets better in time. At first I had to think about her all the time, every time we saw each other was like a blessing, but then I realized it’s like a drug and I’m an addict. So I stopped seeing her, even she calls me now and then to meet up, I pretend that I can’t make it, because if I would see her, I would be broken again.I keep in touch with her just via e-mail and hope that my feelings will disappear in time, or that they will broke up one day and we could eventually end up together. I hope you will figure it out. Stay strong.
I had to fall for the impossible, the one who is damaged so like me and just untouchable. I can’t have him not the way he already has me, he plagues my dreams and every walking thought, and just when I think I am starting to get over him…put some distance between us…. I fall again. Harder, deeper than last. He melts me away. He tell me ‘ I trust you’ its not ‘ I love you’ and it never will be.
These things don’t work. I was friends with this guy for 2 years, and I am infatuated with him, like he’s my thoughts, my dreams… everything. But he is an Atheist and very much older than me, he’s my total and complete opposite. He likes me and I like him, but my religion does not allow me to date outside of my religion and him being 15 years old than me is a HUGE problem for my family. I went a year without talking to him it didn’t help, it doesn’t help… I have a hard time eating, food does not taste or look good to me so I force myself to eat, sometimes throwing it up… I have a happy life I am in nursing school, and my friends and family are there, but seeing them in their happy families and their marriages and relationships make it worse… and the feeling is always there. The thought makes my grades go down, hoping i’ll run into him someday… I deleted him out of my life his picture everything anything that makes me think of him but the thought is still there, I even deleted my facebook because it was annoying me. Prayer doesn’t help really because you pray for the feelings to go away and for yourself to move on, but ultimately you end up praying for the guy instead, because you know he needs those prayers. Yes, time may heal but for me so far… It stinks and doesn’t work!
It has been almost 3 years.
I still cry and feel like I am drifting
I feel like I am in a dream and will never wake up. Ever watch the movie Inception? That is the hell I live in everyday.
:( hope u’ll get better soon
I feel that the days are coudy and the sun doesn’t. Shine. I. Loved her so much and. Cannot figure out why she told me she loved me then just did nt tell me the truth. I gave her everything I had included myself and I sometimes I believei wasn’t good enough for her. I think of her all the time. :-(
Chris.. I know how u feel man.. I’ve been through this once,
you will reach a point to let her go n live ur life..
best luck m8
i am crazy in love with my best friend, she is a girl. We been together for 6 years. Now she telling she is not in love with me anymore, but only like a friend. It is killing me inside, because I can’t have her anymore. What can I do to have her back with me??/
Circumstances made it impossible for me to be with a girl I loved. I have not seen her for a year now, and followed all the advices listed above–no reminders, no photos, etc. Still haven’t forgotten her.It has become a less painful, but I just can’t be with anyone else, because I remember her. Basically I will never be able to have a relationship with a girl again if this continues. Will time eventually make it go away? So far, a year has not helped.
whats really sad it is when you go crazy over a guy that didn’t love you enough to be with you it was just good freaking sex.I mean you really lost it cut your hair off, start doing stupid things and always feeling angry and depress, you fell in love with someone and you thought the feeling was mutual, and you start to think maybe that person allowed people to influence him on how he should feel and he doesn’t have the ball z to stand-up
for what he feels and want so he runs away from love. when that person know ya were meant to be together.but despite all that you feel like a fool for even falling for him because if he really loved you and really wanted you he would be here next to you.but it hurts and i will never put myself out there again but i find myself still thinking about him and feelings for him still lingers. he a sucker for not taking a stand when you in love it don’t let nothing or no one stand in the way of it i just wanna get over him but seems hard to do
i am a certified mess… i met this guy 4 years ago and instantly fell in love. we became friends and spent everyday together. more and more our relationship grew but i never told him how i felt. then my life fell apart and i had nowhere to live. he offered for me to come and stay with him and his roommate. we talked about getting an apt together and seeing where things went. mind you there are several years between us in age and im older. the longer i stayed with him and the roomate the more scared of my feelings i got and the more afraid i got the more it seemed his feeling grew for me as well. one night when i was in his room we carried our relationship somewhere that petrified me, i told him i had to leave and the next day i did. i gave into my fear. periodicly we had phone contact but i was gone for a year and returned to the area where he was still living not telling him i was back. but he found out and showed up 2days later.we seen each other off n on for about 4 months but then i started seeing him everyday. my roommate was an abusive alcholic and he offered me again to come n stay with him, so i did to be in a safer calmer environment. i still love him with all my heart and over these last 3weeks we are as close as ever. he says he doesnt want the relationship. he is afraid ill hurt him again and that he “cant” love me? he sure doesnt act like someone who doesnt love someone???? he is the one person including my parents who ever worried about me and what i was going through, he always makes me smile even when the days are hardest to get through. i dont know what to do? can anyone help me?
I am currently engaged to be married after 5 yrs of being in the relationship and its due in a few months. But my family disagrees with it and up to now still hoping I would change my mind. He is working abroad now and he has been away for a year. When he was away I had time for myself and I realized, I was very dependent of him. And in those times I was madly in love with him, I was not myself. And now we are away, I begun to realized his imperfection, immaturity and unreasonable thinking and my longing for marriage seems to fade. I am confused right now, as my life as been easier without him. I feel happier about myself, although I love him but I love myself more without him…. Needs help?
ggirl,if you have discovered that you do not want to marry then walk away. the relationship may have been something of a convienience for you and now you find yourself free of the norm and it’s liberating. i married someone who was convienient for me th marriage lasted less than a year, i knew i didnt want to marry him but allowed outsiders to decide what was best for me and did as they wished… follow your heart and your intuition and you will find the answers within
i’m going through the same thing, ive been in love with the same person for nearly 2 years. It feels as if someone has ripped my heart out and stood on it. I get told all the time that i will get over him eventually and yes id like to believe i will. Falling in love with someone you became friends with is never a good idea. i have been through so much with him, so much pain we’ve both equally shared. the thought of what we could have had now kills me. I haven’t spoken to him in over a month now and i still wait for that text, he knows what hes doing to me and how much a care. Even though hes has a gf in the 2 years ive been in love with him he still always comes back to me. I dont know what to do, i have never in my life felt so inlove with someone it actually hurts, he hurts me nowadays without even trying to. i cry nearly everyday because everything i do reminds me of him. He is in my thoughts constantly. i know why he feels we cant be together but hes scared and has admitted it himself. when i last saw him he kissed me knowing fine well how i felt, he said he wanted to see if the feelings were still there and said they were but two days later he told me he couldnt do it. my heart stops everytime i think of it. Hes my everything! i do stupid things to make him see my name and i post stupid things to make him think. i dont know how im going to ever get over him, i cant see my life without him, am so scared to loose him and he isnt even mine :’( there are only 2 people who know everything about me and him and everything ive been through. i wish i hadnt went through what i did last year because at least now id have a part of him :(
i know he will know its him if he reads this and i dont care. if he ever misses me i want him to let me know because i miss him every minute of everyday! life is too short to let go of the one you love so i know i will hold onto him for as long as i can. he means so much to me and i love him with all my heart…. “to the moon and back”
i dont know how to get over him because hes effected every part of my life.
x
I know all ur pain. Me and my girlfriend have been dating since 7th grade. We had our lives “planned” but she said that she was talking to an old friend and she was wanting to hang out with him. Well i had to work so i couldn’t join them. I figured that our love was strong enough that i didnt think to much about it. Then while im working she calls to say that she is leaving me for him. I tried to save our relationshi but she decided she didnt want me. Ive been hurting ever since.
I regret that i didn’t make a move earlier.. things could be different :(
but i guess regretting now gets me nothing but sadness
A old friend find me on FB .. who liked me alot it seem we talked back and forward I finally want to visit him and I fall in love with him….It hit me like a mad truck…His married with kids I know it was wrong and I was not asking for him to leave his family for me …My problem is I can’t stop thinking about him & I know it’s wrong but my heart don’t know. I told him how I feel, He’s acted as if I’m lied to him about my feeling I give that hurt as much ..knowing I will never have him.