Tag Archives: love

13
Sep

battle

battle
3
Feb

Good Hearts

The best people possess a feeling for beauty, the courage to take risks, the discipline to tell the truth, the capacity for sacrifice. Ironically, their virtues make them vulnerable; they are often wounded, sometimes destroyed.

Ernest Hemingway

4
Dec

Time

Time

<3

24
Oct

Anger and Love

While a man was polishing his new car,
his 4 year sold son picked up a stone
and scratched lines on the side of the car.

In anger, the man took the child’s hand

and hit it many times not realizing
he was using a wrench.

At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers
due to multiple fractures.

When the child saw his father…..
with painful eyes he asked, ‘Dad when will my fingers grow back?’
The man was so hurt and speechless;
he went back to his car and kicked it a lot of times.

Devastated by his own actions….. .
sitting in front of that car he looked at the scratches;
the child had written ‘LOVE YOU DAD’.

Anger and Love have no limits;
choose the latter to have a beautiful, lovely life & remember this:
Things are to be used and people are to be loved.
The problem in today’s world is that people are used while things are loved.

Let’s try always to keep this thought in mind:
Things are to be used,
People are to be loved.

Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character;
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.

16
Apr

Falling in love with someone you can’t have

I am just so sad. I just want to sit and cry forever. I miss him so much. I didn’t talk to him today and I know that’s what I wanted but I keep thinking about him all the time. Wondering about where he is and what he’s doing. I know that I really don’t want to know but why won’t my mind and heart stop? I feel like I will never be happy again. I feel like I will never find love again. Why? What did I do to deserve this crap? I always did my best by him, so why did he just drop me like yesterday’s garbage? I don’t understand. Why did this have to happen to me? It just hurts so much. Will I ever be happy again? Does this ever get any better? I just feel like it never will.

Getting over someone can sometimes appear to be impossible. It feels really bad when you fall in love with someone you can’t have. It feels even worse when you are sure that this relationship can never work out. I think that this is the worst thing that could ever happen to someone. I believe that to forget someone is one of the hardest assignments given in life, especially if you had this gut feeling that he/she is the ONE. Therefore all of these thoughts crossing my mind drove me deeply into the psychology of what is called falling wrongly into love.

Getting over someone you love will be a matter of weeks if not days.

If you think that pain is an essential part of love, if you think that lovers should suffer then stop reading. However, if you believe that exaggerated attachment is something that hinders you from living a happy life and if you believe that this pain is unnecessary then keep reading. Breakups won’t hurt like they used to, you wont label anybody as the one from now on and recovery is going to take place much faster.

How to get over someone you love

Since I am not a magician, I can’t say that a simple writing will do the job, and this pain won’t disappear in a blink of an eye, but remember, reading this will make you feel as you are a step closer to get rid of this pain that unfortunately could last for years.

Figuring out how to get over someone you love can be one of the most difficult things that any of us will ever have to do. The pain of loss can be very intense and finding the answers can be like looking for a needle in a haystack. You need to know that it will take a lot of time and some days will be harder than others. If you have been with someone for a long period of time, their absence can make you feel like a part of you is missing, like you just had your heart ripped right out of your chest. But once you discover how to get over someone you love, the pain in your heart will lessen and you sill start feeling more like your old self again.

Sometimes I wish I could just smack the idiot that came up with the phraseTime heals all wounds“. Actually, the person that said that, is right. You may not want to hear this but, time is the exact remedy needed for this wound. That being said, it does not mean that you have to like it. I know that I never did. There are ways for you to take an active approach in helping time heal you a little faster though.

Start by ditching the photos. You do not need the constant visual reminder of happy times spent with that person drawing your attention at every turn. Throw away or put in storage any of their belongings that they have left behind. You may also want to consider trying to stay away from some of the places that the two of you used to hang out at. You will never find out how to get over someone you love if you are constantly running into them.

Don’t be afraid to use your friends as a sounding board. In most cases they have been through a painful break up too. Spend as much time with them as you can. When you are having a good time with friends, your mind will be occupied and you will not be thinking about that person so much. Just because you are trying to figure out how to get over someone you love does not mean that you should stop living your life. I know that this can be a very trying time in your life. Losing someone you love is never easy. But there is one thing that you may not have considered. Is it really and truly over between you and your loving person? If you really do love them it may be possible for you to get your loving person back. You can lose the love of your life due to both of :being foolish, stubborn, and too proud to admit that you are really in love and needed . Of course, you are the only one that can decide if the love you have is worth saving. If there is even a possibility that you can save your relationship, you really need to give it a try.

A Painful Process

To get over someone you love you have to realize that there are no easy answers. No matter how ready you think you are, the fact that you are asking yourself how to get over someone you love, means that it is going to be a painful process. It can be a slow process You might think you are over someone and a year later being reminded of that person and feel sad again. That does not mean that you’re not overcome the loving person.

If you are emotionally invested in a supposed relationship and it ends, it could make you feel sad for years. Maybe even for the rest of your life. But that does not mean the sadness has to make you feel depressed. You can get over your loss and still know that it made you sad. It’s the period of time soon after the loss that will be the hardest to get passed. This is the period where you ask yourself how to get over someone you love and she does not love you back.

Removing Reminders

If the break up is a fresh one usually the only way to get over the pain is to face it straight out and let time pass. It is going to hurt, no matter what you do. But there are some things you can do to lessen the pain. Start with removing noticeable visual reminders of the person if possible. Pictures of them can be put away for now. Gifts they gave you can also be put away for now. Avoiding the places you used to go together is a good idea as well. This tip can be found in lists everywhere on how to get over a lost love so it is at least a popular idea that is worth trying.

 

 

Living Life after the Breakup

If you are having difficulty living your life after the breakup, it might be a good idea to seek counseling. Simply let the counselor know that you just went through a break up and ask the counselor how to get over someone you love. They can offer you better advice than a generic list about how to get over someone you love. They can also offer better advice than family and friends.

Friends and Family

Your friends and family may feel they know your situation too well. Some of them may even have motives to help you get over the person who does not love you back. They might have not liked the person so they want you to get over them quickly and move on to someone else. With a counselor you can privately tell them things you would not want your friends and family to know.

If you seek out counseling you should continue to see them for as long as you need to. If the counselor feels like you are dwelling on the breakup longer than you need to, they will let you know.

Advices

  • I am going through this right now. For those of you whose situation is similar, this is what I suggest: Deal with reality. Stop hoping, dreaming, etc. Pray and tell God that you forgive them for not being able to love you. Ask God to take this from you – and He will. Then continue to deal with reality. Don’t tell yourself, maybe someday… they’ll change… True love accepts the person for who they are, even when they are evil and they don’t love you. It means accepting reality. When you love and accept reality at the same time, you are forced to move on. When you deal with reality and move on without love, you take bitterness with you. When you love without dealing with reality, you hurt yourself. Love the other person, Accept the reality and pray to God for the wisdom and strength you’ll need to do that continuously until it ceases to become a problem.
  • Try not to be in contact because its almost like an addiction. You think that one little text will do no harm but the pain when he doesn’t reply will just make things worse.
  • Time…. Letting yourself grieve and actually being ok with that. Not forcing yourself to get over someone. Allow yourself to feel the hurt, cry, write about it, listen to sad songs. Soon you will feel so tired from hurting all of the time. You will be ready to move forward. Doing this without contact of the person you love is best. Anyone that will still see you, sleep with you, and spend time with you, knowing they don’t love you, and knowing how you feel, is selfish. Everyone deserves more than that. You can’t force love out of your heart so don’t try, that just hurts worse and you end up lying to yourself. You are human for loving, but you have to love yourself more. I do agree with comments on staying busy, friends and family also help. Casual dating can backfire however, because if the dates don’t go well, it will just make you miss the person you love even more. Pray, and remember the good times but learn from the bad. Don’t you want, one day, to be truly happy? Life is to short to give up the chance of true love for yourself. Go out into the world and continue to be the wonderful person that you are. Someone will see this, and love you just as much as you are capable of loving.
  • maybe you should really think, are they the one for me? And do i really love them?
  • You have no choice but to get over this person… let them go and move on.
You never stop loving someone; you just learn to live without them.
You have to know that there is now another step to walk in your life..
there will be always happiness and love, hope you’ll find it
i wish you all the best.. just keep smiling : )

13
Apr

THE GRIEVING PROCESS

The grieving process …

Which i hope none of u will live it ,

  • Denial and isolation

Denial is a healthy response to a highly stressful situation; it acts as a temporary buffer to protect the individual from the shock of what is to be faced. Isolation is a way of pulling away from others to avoid dealing with the loss

  • Anger

Includes feelings of rage, envy, and resentment.

Anger asks, “why me?” Sometimes anger is expressed indirectly as complaints about health-care professionals, or feeling abandoned by God.

  • Bargaining

Most bargains are made with God or a higher being, as a way to get a second chance. A way of fantasizing that the loss didn’t happen

  • Depression

The feelings of loss become overwhelming.

Depression has been defined as an emotional state that involves sadness, gloominess and pessimisms regarding the future. Depression often includes feelings of guilt and personal worthlessness

  • Acceptance

Acceptance is not necessarily a happy stage or response. Often it is a time when the individual can now talk about the loss and begin to see a future.

Healing process ?

Grieving is a roller coaster of emotions, you may feel crazy, but you are not. Grieving is natural, normal and an important part of recovery. Grieving has no order or time limit.

Grieving doesn’t necessarily end; it evolves from intensity, to a longing to a memory. It is most important to attend to the responses of grieving.

Grief work is exhausting. Take time to nurture yourself, take things slow.

When you feel good enjoy it,

When u feels sad, attend to it.

Reach out for support, let family and friends know what you need.

Learn to accept that your loss is real. For many people who are grieving a loss, the first impulse is to deny the loss. Grieving denial can range from downplaying the loss, as if it’s not important, to having the delusion that the person is still alive.

It’s often easier for people who are grieving to have an intellectual understanding of the death than an emotional understanding (the loved one is not coming back). So the first task for the grieving person is accepting that the loved one is really gone.

Make it OK to feel the pain.
The pain of grieving can be both emotional and physical, and unfortunately there’s no way to avoid it. Denying the pain of grieving can lead to physical symptoms and can also prolong the grieving process.

Some people try to avoid grieving pain by being busy or traveling; others try to minimize grieving their loss by idealizing the loved one or refusing to allow negative thoughts about the loved one enter their minds. Some grieving people use drugs or alcohol to deaden the pain.

Feeling the pain of grieving is difficult, but it’s an important step toward healing.

Adjust to living without the deceased.
When a loved one dies, we also lose the part of our lifestyle that included the deceased. So while we are grieving for the loved one, we are also grieving for the parts of our life that will never be the same. Sometimes it can take a few months following the death for this realization to sink in.

Find a safe place in your heart for your loved one, and allow yourself to move on.
This task can be especially hard for a grieving person because it can feel at first that you’re being disloyal when you start to think about enjoying a life that doesn’t include the deceased.

It’s likely that memories of the loved one will stay with you throughout your life, and sometimes, even years after the death, you may feel a stab of pain when you think about the beloved person that was so important to you.

When this happens, it’s important to remind yourself that it’s a normal part of the grieving and healing process. Allow yourself to have these feelings.

Learning to cherish a memory without letting it control you is a very important step in the grieving process. By finding a special safe “place” for that person, you can heal from grieving and move back into your life. You begin to find joy in new experiences, and you can take comfort in the knowledge that you keep your cherished memories with you, wherever you go.

Do not feel ashamed of your sadness and grief by trying to contain or hide it. Tears are meant to cleanse and relieve. Cry out your pain. Pray out your grief. Peace will come.

Often the best way to overcome our own sadness and grief is to help someone else feel better. What we give out into the world comes back ten-fold. That includes the love and help we extend to another.

What do you do with the love that you feel?

For many people, the hardest part of losing a loved one and grieving that loss is figuring out what to do with all the love they feel for the person that is gone.

Remind yourself that you don’t have to stop loving someone just because he or she is no longer with you. When a memory pops up, send a loving thought and know that you are loved in return. You may find comfort in this, and the strength to continue on in your journey.

It is better to have loved and lost than to have not loved at all

I hope this will help someone to get through his or her sadness ..


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